1) Leave the mobile phone off! Do not answer it if it is on Silent either. You should only do this if you are expecting an emergency and I mean an emergency. You only look like a deadhead, self-centered fool answering a phone at a meeting that is important and that goes for all meetings. It’s inconsiderate and breeds contempt from the other party even if they agree to you answering it. They’re only being polite which you’re not if you do have a ringing phone and answer it. This does not mean leave it at home – you may need it later.
2) Don’t smoke anything in the presence of others unless they also smoke and for goodness sake make sure that no one near you is eating. Never smoke in an area where people are eating even if they smoke. You would be a fool to smoke in the presence of your data when they didn’t smoke. If you’re keen, it may be time to think about not smoking in their presence again.
3) A good rule is not to talk about your achievements unless you are asked. Bragging is more often frowned upon and puts people off early. Show some interest in your date and their hobbies achievements and interests. If you do this regularly enough, it will become a habit and your good social skills will become very obvious to others including your date.
4) Find some way to compliment them. This is good practice even if you don’t think this person is right for you. What goes around comes around! This is also a great building block for social skills improvement.
5) Smart casual attire is always good for the first date. Girls – don’t go over the top with jewelry. It looks crass and sometimes cheap! Subtlety is the name of the game here. Boys – don’t swear or cuss. It only indicates ignorance and sometimes stupidity. It does not make you look tough. Your actions and the way you deal with life will show how tough you are quick enough. Most people can find an adjective somewhere in their vocabulary to describe things. You’ll find that you can too!
6) Most girls like to be respected and despite their eyelashes fluttering away in some scenarios, they are generally quite bright and one step ahead of you. The more you treat them like your equal in conversation, the more quickly you will identify a good match for you or not.
7) Most boys like to have interest shown in their achievements or interests. In fact, you could just focus on this for the whole date and be safe if you wanted to.
8) Eat like a human being – don’t quaff down the food like it’s your last meal. Don’t fill up. This will ensure that you can feel good about doing something after you’ve dined i.e. dancing, a walk even consider going to a different venue for coffee, dessert, dancing, or a drink perhaps. Mixing you’re venues often displays varying behavior. If your date begins to swing from a chandelier after one drink you may want to consider the future carefully.
9) Boys – if you enjoyed your date, say so at the end of the evening. Follow up with a thoughtful gift such as flowers to her place of work or her doorstep. It does NOT have to be expensive. The surprise is what counts here along with the fact that you have obviously thought about her since the date. Handwrite the card and leave a phone number she can catch you on.
10) Girls – try not to make yourself too available at the end of your first date. But make your feelings clear with an element of subtlety. Whatever you do not ask him if he will call again. Your mindset must be one of value and that it doesn’t call then there will be another who will.
One more thing – on your first few dates never, and I mean never get in a discussion of old boyfriends or girlfriends, ex-wives or husbands, nor anything to do with these issues – Never!